How He Loves

Let thy goodness, like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to thee.
Prone to wander; Lord, I feel it, prone to leave the God I love;
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above.

The day of “lasts” finally draws to a close. The moment I got into my apartment, I just had to take a seat and take in everything that happened today.

Today was my last choir practice as the music minister of ODU’s CCM. It was also our last Soul Food/End of the Year Banquet. Unexpectedly, I also found out today during Adoration that I’m a step closer to the ministry position I’ve sought after for the past four months (which involved a lot of imperfect patience). The answer I’ve been waiting for for months was finally right in front of me and I couldn’t stop smiling as I gazed upon the face of my Beloved Jesus in the Most Blessed Sacrament.

Today was all kinds of crazy. So many emotions.

My heart is overwhelmed with an immense amount of love. God poured out His love in very big and crazy ways this year after I said “yes” to His asking of me to come to Norfolk. And He never ceased to pour out His love and mercy on me as I struggled with my daily crosses and discernment. In no way am I saying it’s over; but God, in the most simple yet profound way, reminded me that every single thing that happens in my life – whether it’s good or bad – is a result of His love for me. His most holy will consist of nothing but LOVE and mercy and that leaves me with so much peace and gratitude.

Like I said, today was a day of “lasts.” I didn’t cry during the festivities (thank God!) but I did cry like a baby once I got home and finally read through all the sweet, sweet notes. One of my dear students gave me this additional gift because she said it reminded her of me when she saw it. It’s a book with some of the greatest hymns ever composed along with the stories behind these uplifting lyrics to their melodious tunes. I got so happy once I turned to one of my personal favorites…

This is exactly how I feel.

After wiping away my tears and finally regaining full composure, I sang this familiar, beloved tune to the Lord and every single word resonated in my heart in the most perfect way. As an imperfect being, I already know that in a few weeks I will be feeling the impatience and doubt come to the surface once again, just like the words of the final verse of this song. And while I am fully aware of that, I will unceasingly pray that my heart may never stop believing in His love. His unchanging love.

How He loves… He how He loves us.

In Christ’s love,
Fatima